Casting the 90s

Due to the flashback to the 90s that our country is currently experiencing I have decided to help Hollywood out and save them the money they’d spend on casting directors for the live-action remakes of 90s cartoons that are bound to pop up in the next year. Here’s what I have so far:

Josh Hutcherson as T.J. Detweiler (RECESS)

TJ was ‘da bomb! He is a great example of what a leader should be: loyal, outgoing, strategic, stylish. Josh could definitely play him. Though, we’d have to put him through a time machine though since he’s like 18 now. But I would pay big bucks ($7-$10) to see a live-action version of this epic cartoon.

Bette Midler as Ms. Frizzle (Magic School Bus)

The hair says it all. Ms. Frizzle is the epitome of the greatest teacher ever. I consider Ms. Frizzles’ ‘do to be the equivalent of Mary Poppins’ carpetbag. Thus, Bette Midler’s equally impressive ‘do is the only one comparable to the original. I’m really casting the hair more than the actress, but it’ll do.

Elle Fanning as Sharon Spitz (BraceFace)


Little Elle Fanning is rising up in Hollywood. I think that in a year or so she’ll be angsty enough to tackle the role of Sharon. She needs braces anyway…

Jonah Hill as Hoodsey (As Told By Ginger)

There basically the same person. Honestly, anyone could play Hoodsey provided that they constantly wear a hoodie. Who could tell the difference anyway?

Open for Suggestions: Uncle Tito (Rocket Power)

Uncle Tito is a classic character that made me want my own rotund Hawaiian mentor (he was supposed to be Hawaiian, right?). But who can I trust to play such a momentous character? He has to be adequately robust and pull off a wardrobe consisting completely of Hawaiian t-shirts. I’m at a total loss. Any ideas?

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