Teenage Wasteland


It’s amazing how much TV you miss when you don’t have a TV. It’s also amazing how much you realize that a lot of shows on television today truly suck. I don’t have a TV in my dorm room and, even if I did, my residence hall is the only one on campus that doesn’t get cable so I’d be out of luck anyway. Throughout my time in college I have discovered that I never really needed a television in the first place. Half the stuff on TV these days is complete and utter crap–at least the stuff on during the day. I feel like Prime-time and HBO are the only things worth watching anymore. Case and point: Secret Life of the American Teenager. It’s more than a train wreck, it’s a like watching ten train wrecks while listening to the sounds of raccoon’s dying. I don’t understand how any teenager’s life is as screwed up as the ones portrayed in the show. Not to mention that their parents are almost more immature than their kids are. What makes me sad is that they act like life is supposed to be that way. Refer to the show’s title to see their outrageous claim that they are revealing some sort of big secret. I beg to differ. It doesn’t seem like the characters on the show are keeping any secrets at all. That’s probably the reason they are getting into all these dramatic situations. Just stop telling people your secrets, people! At least Degrassi: The Next Generation has class–please note that my working definition for class has been significantly altered considering the state of TV these days. However, if that’s really a portrayal of the “next” generation, what will the “next next” generation be like? I can only imagine a world run by sexually frustrated adolescents employed at the local mall kiosk jacked up on cocaine and just looking for that certain special emotionally-dependent person to fulfill their need for negative attention and take them to the senior prom. We are surely doomed.

And don’t get me started on Snookie.

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