The Pros and Cons of the Handicapped “John”

I’ve decided that the handicap stall in public restrooms has pros and cons that are worth blogging about. Don’t question my choice in topic, just open your mind to the benefits and downfalls of an overlooked commodity:

Pros:

1. Space – it’s got room for you to breath and you don’t have to squeeze past the doorway to get in.
2. Privacy – no one bothers you when you’re in the handicap stall because they either think it’s rude to rush a handicapped person or that the occupant is too handicapped to help pass toilet paper under the partition wall.
3. Support – don’t lie, we all love those handicap bars inside the stall – they’re so versatile! You can use them to keep your purse off the ground to to escape having to actually touch the germ-ridden porcelain below. Come on, you know it’s true!

Cons:

1. Space – Although mostly a benefit, the enlarged stall makes it easier for people to see between the cracks in the partition walls, thus seeing you in all of your exposed glory. Also, the large space tends to create an uncomfortable draft.
2. Location – Firstly, the stall is located in the back back of restrooms, requiring you to walk the full length of the restroom in order to find it. Secondly, during this walk you will be seen by every bathroom occupant who will in turn notice that, although you are not handicapped whatsoever, just took the handicapped stall away from someone else. Have you ever walked out of the handicapped stall only to see that a handicapped person was waiting to use it? Don’t you feel like a jerk?
3. The Obvious – It’s a handicap stall. So everything inside it is built closer to the floor: toilet paper dispenser, purse rack, door handle, and, mostly importantly, the toilet seat. You always get the roller-coaster feeling when sitting…